Monday, August 28, 2006

The country I admire most...

Well besides Cuba, North Korea, and Iran is Brazil. You know they are completely energy self sufficient. They are such forward-thinkers down there. Why couldn't we just follow their model in using sugar cane to make ethanol? All it took was 20 years of military dictatorship and tens of billions of dollars in subsidies for them to do it. I know, I know they use a lot of locally produced natural gas and oil but it just sounds good to say they are self-sufficient thanks to "green fuels". All we need to do is level all of florida and plant sugar cane. We wouldn't be losing much, just a red state with all those Nazi Cuban-Americans. We could always just expropriate their land and homes, they're used to it.

On another note, it's awesome being a best-selling author and one of Time Magazine's 25 most influential Hispanics. It means I can spout of bullshit like "Brazil's energy independence is great" without knowing anything about the issue. It's because I'm gifted, don't you know? Facts, who needs facts? Another advantage is that I don't have to report to anyone. Nobody sending me on bullshit assignments like when I was in Reno writing for that rag The Reno Gazette-Journal and they sent me to eat sheep testicles. I swear it was a "mountain oyster" festival. It was so disgusting that I barfed all over the place. And that was before I ate!

I like my testicles raw and still attached, thank you very much.


Not "crazy eyes" Alisa


Anonymous said...

Don't you just love ignoramuses who claim Brazil is "completely" self-sufficient in energy? Last May 1, castro protege Evo Morales confiscated ALL of Brazil's natural gas in Bolivia, forty stinking percent of the natgas used to power and light Brazil's largest city, Sao Paulo. That little communist fucker (who said he wanted to bring castro a coca cake for his 80th birthday) helped himself to Brazil's gas, stole it, ripped them off, putting the vast nation over a barrel, and Lula himself (that's the president of Brazil, for Ignorant Chick's information, NOT a baseball player!) said that Brazil's central planners had made a BIG MISTAKE in depending on Morales' gas. So much for vaunted central planning, now Brazil is paying for it, having to suck up to a little castroite like Morales just to flip on a light switch in Sao Paulo. Dumbchick.

Anonymous said...

Just curious, do you spend the rest of the day in porn-less masturbation or do you actually have a life besides living it as Alisa's evil twin?

Not one to comment.